Saturday, March 13, 2010

Sober Diet

So, last night was a fucking lame ass night. It was Jon's birthday and it was just completely shitty. So it was agreed upon that tonight would have to be really, really fun to make up for it. It was quite eventful.

I started the day off with a nice lunch at Panera Bread with Melisse and Isabella, and then we went to the mall with Adam and James so that we could take them shopping, and fix their clothes (you know, give them clothes that fit... and have colors). So we did that and then we went to Melisse's house, where I taught Adam how to put contacts in. Then, we started the party when Jon, Brett, Isabella, and James arrived with Rum and Vodka after they'd all gotten high. (I don't know if I've mentioned before but I don't drink or do drugs) So everyone's drinking and having a good time, and then Brett and Adam want to go to Wendy's so I drive them there. They get their food, Brett drinks a cup of Buffalo sauce. Gross.

We head back and Melisse's wasted out of her mind. Her friend's Erica and Nate had come, and they were sober too. Then Melisse got a text from her mom that said she was going to be there soon so Erica, Nate and I cleaned everything up and we decided we'd get everyone to the golf course in Melisse's community. Before we do that Melisse had to pee. I had to help her. I saw her vagina. I don't think she realized though, because she wasn't embarrassed. Her vagina seemed like it was blushing though so who knows.

We get everyone to the golf course. Melisse gets a few texts from her mom about how she's in trouble and needs to come home but Melisse is too drunk so we decide to stop by Walmart and get her some food and water. Not really helpful, and just kind of spat mush all over my car. We drive around a bit trying to sober her up. She vomits and gets sober. I take her home and she seems okay to get in bed.

I pick everyone up from the golf course and they want food so we go to McDonald's. I try to get everyone to put their seat belts on and Adam gets mad at me and starts telling me off. I let him finish and then I give him a few verbal bitch slaps. He stays quiet for a bit and then apologizes.

I get their McDonald's and then drop them off at Isabella's house. I go home and go:

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Bright side? I've discovered that by not drinking, cleaning up after your friends, carrying them the mile between a golf course and someone's house multiple times, and being the only voice of logic probably burns a lot of calories. I think I'm going to market it. Sober Diet.

For an idea of how drunk Isabella is now, here's what she just IMed me:

xxxxx (1:05:49 AM): jsut because I typoed doewsnt make me drunk
xxxxx (1:05:57 AM): I havenb't been typoing until now ;_;
xxxxx (1:06:02 AM): *haven't
xxxxx (1:06:11 AM): *doesn't

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